Self-Esteem & Self-Trust Therapy in Rhode Island & Maryland
For when you’re capable of making your own decisions, but you have a hard time believing they’re the right ones.
You can make a decision and still spend hours wondering if you should have chosen differently.
You look for reassurance. Compare yourself to other people. Question whether you’re being too sensitive, expecting too much, or making a bigger deal out of something than you should.
At some point, all that second-guessing makes it hard to know when to trust your own judgment.
You Don’t Have to Hate Yourself to Have a Hard Time Trusting Yourself
Self-doubt can be surprisingly subtle.
It can look like needing someone else to confirm a decision before you feel comfortable with it. Dismissing compliments. Comparing your progress to everyone else’s. Assuming other people know better. Or changing your mind the second someone questions your choice.
You might also notice yourself:
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Focusing on what you did wrong instead of what went well
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Being much harder on yourself than you’d ever be on someone else
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Struggling to take credit for things you’ve accomplished
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Looking outside yourself for reassurance or validation
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Assuming mistakes say something bigger about who you are
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Questioning your own feelings, needs, or perceptions
Eventually, it gets difficult to tell the difference between reconsidering something and simply not trusting yourself.
Would You Talk to Anyone Else the Way You Talk to Yourself?
You make a mistake, and your brain keeps the receipt.
Something goes well, and you explain why it doesn’t really count.
Someone else struggles, and you can immediately find compassion for them.
When you struggle, suddenly the standard changes.
That kind of self-criticism can become so automatic that you barely notice it anymore.
In therapy, we can start paying attention to the expectations you’ve set for yourself, where they came from, and whether the way you’re talking to yourself is actually helping you move forward, or just making everything heavier.
Sometimes You Already Know What You Think, You Just Don’t Trust It Yet
There’s nothing wrong with asking people you trust for advice.
But when every decision turns into a group project, it can become harder to hear your own opinion underneath everyone else’s.
We can work on getting clearer about your values, preferences, and priorities so you have something more reliable to come back to when doubt kicks in.
You may still ask for advice. You just won’t need someone else’s approval before you can feel okay with your own answer.
We’ll Pay Attention to the Patterns You Might Not Notice Anymore
Maybe you automatically assume you’re the problem. Downplay something you did well. Talk yourself out of what you want. Or dismiss your own feelings before anyone else gets the chance.
Those patterns are worth looking at.
I’ll help you notice how you’re talking to yourself, what you believe about yourself, and how those beliefs affect the choices you make.
And because I believe therapy should be an honest conversation, I’ll also point out when I hear you being unfair to yourself or letting self-doubt make decisions for you.
What Would Change If You Actually Believed Yourself?
Maybe you’d:
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Make a decision without immediately reopening it for debate
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Accept a compliment without explaining why you don’t deserve it
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Recover from a mistake without questioning your entire competence
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Notice comparison without automatically deciding someone else is doing life better
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Take your own feelings seriously
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Give yourself credit for what you’ve accomplished
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Trust that you can handle a decision even if it doesn’t turn out perfectly
Confidence doesn’t have to mean walking around convinced you’re right about everything. Sometimes it’s simply knowing you’ll be okay even when you’re not.
Online Therapy for Self-Esteem & Self-Trust in Rhode Island and Maryland
I provide individual online therapy for adults throughout Rhode Island and Maryland.
If you’re tired of needing reassurance before you can trust your own choices, we can start looking at what keeps making your own voice so easy to question.
You already have opinions, instincts, preferences, and strengths. Let’s make them a little easier to hear.
